...would have to be "being single permanently" or missing the healthy range of childbearing years, and not be able to have children.
okay, so this is kinda starting to get depressing...this is a real fear for me, and i honestly feel sometimes that i'm not going to meet the "man of my dreams". i sometimes think my standards are too specific, but then i realize, i'm particular about more than men...so it's normal for me to have preferences. i have preferences for myself and i know what i can offer and i won't settle for less.
...which scares me. because i don't know if i'm playing russian roulette about this. sure, i go on dates and find men attractive, but enough to commit?
attraction goes past the physical. i really want a well traveled man who is happy with his current job/career, is independent, is God-fearing and family-oriented. the reason i don't think this is excessive is because it describes me right now. i want an equal. not someone i have to bring up to speed or accept "as is". granted, i KNOW there are things about myself that need work. that's why i'm trying to eat more healthy and live a more balanced lifestyle. a bunch of good qualities mean nothing if your body isn't healthy. looks aren't everything, but a pretty smile and clear complexion helps. i really don't think that's asking too much.
...and then sometimes i think it's too specific. but then if i'm not specific, i'm settling. it's a crazy world.
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